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The tale of the time that Donald Pleasence saved Adrienne Barbeau from some thugs in St​.​Louis

from The Pleasencing! by Miscellaneous Plumbing Fixtures

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lyrics

1980 downtown St.Louis
there’s people trying to Escape from New York
Donald Pleasance, Lee Van Cleef
and Ernest Borgnine
huddle round a burning car
cold and dark
Over in the Library
Harry Dean Stanton
makes speeches, makes soup and makes mess
while Adrienne Barbeau is stealing the show
while barely being contained by her dress

then late one evening
in a bad part of town
Barbeau finds herself a bit lost
She went out to buy herself spark plugs
but forgot all her cash and couldn’t cover the cost
when down a dark alley
around twelve o’clock
a menacing gang did appear
with flick knives and chains, batons and pipes
filling Barbeau full of fear.

Oh no
What will Barbeau do
She’s stranded
no weapon no clue
maybe she could fend them off with her shoe
won’t somebody help Barbeau
won’t somebody help Barbeau

Then out of the darkness
a figure haloed in light
stood ready to take the gang on
was it mighty Kurt Russell, Barbeau thought,
Was it Isaac, was it Harry was it John?

In fact it was Donald Pleasence armed to the teeth
a towel round his neck like a cape
you picked the wrong dame to be picking on
he said in his distinctive tones
I’ll teach you all a lesson and no mistake

oh yes
Pleasance will save the day
he’s fearless, miraculous
and better in every way
he twirled his sword
to keep the hoodlums at bay
Pleasance is here to help Barbeau Oh!
Pleasance is here to help Barbeau

he takes one out with a dagger, another with his gun
he does kung fu karate on the whole bunch
he taught Steven Seagal everything he knows
and taught Liam Neeson how to throat punch.
the gang all run off, tails between their legs
and Barbeau feels her heart re start up in her
she is so thankful she shows him her appreciation
and made him promise never to tell John Carpenter

credits

from The Pleasencing!, released May 7, 2015
Written, performed and produced by Jon Cross of Miscellaneous Plumbing Fixtures.

Copyright Om/No Productions Music 2015

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Miscellaneous Plumbing Fixtures New Milford, Connecticut

Songwriting and banging your instruments together

The main thing I love to do is write songs. I pick up various instruments from ukulele to piano, accordion to percussion and electric guitar to harmonica and bang them about to try and get close to the noises I hear in my head but the writing comes first. ... more

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